CRUISE CONTROL SCARES ‘PARK’

March 17, 2006 — HOLLYWOOD bully Tom Cruise got Comedy Central to cancel Wednesday night’s cablecast of a controversial “South Park” episode about Scientology by warning that he’d refuse to promote “Mission Impossible 3,” insiders say.

Tom Cruise, you are a piece of crap!

Official statement of Matt Stone and Trey Parks (hat tip Andrew Sullivan)

” So, Scientology, you may have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for earth has just begun! Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!

- Trey Parker and Matt Stone, servants of the dark lord Xenu.”

You suck ass Tom Cruise… Go live in Iran if you don’t like the freedom for people to say what they want… You used to be the crazy dude that people just tolerated, but no longer.. you are dead to me… DEAD!

All Hail Xenu!!!!